I went to the mall today… for like the 5th time this month. Just when I think my Christmas shopping is done and done, I remember a distant cousin or ministry friend that needs some holiday love withdrawn from my checking account. ‘Tis the season, right?

I discovered a recent (I’m probably the last 20-something a part of the digital-age to discover this) Christmas miracle… the ability to do all your Christmas shopping online! Glory to God in the highest, and goodwill to all men!

And yet, still, with the wonderful invention of the Internet that makes my Christmas shopping delightfully consumer (consumer being me, of course) friendly, I have forgotten things and now find myself past the point of depending on the US Postal Service to deliver before Santa does on Christmas Eve.

So I was at the Westfield Sherman Oaks Mall, where everyone in the parking lot was filled with good cheer, singing carols and passing out candy canes to all the little children as they skipped with glee into the nearest department store…Or tailgating, chatting on their cell phones, yelling with road rage, and waving the international symbol of the discontented driver- the wonderfully jolly middle finger.

Ahh, the joys of Christmas traditions! ☺

You need a strategy for mall shopping in December. Some people shop in packs for protection. Others come prepared with a map and a plan of attack. I’m pretty sure I saw a couple in Macy’s with walkie-talkies speaking to each other with code names from Top Gun.

I used to think these people were crazy. Used to. Over the years, I’ve come to admire their military-like tactics. Maybe they’ve lost the Christmas spirit, but if Christmas Eve at the mall is the dark alley of Holidays, than I’d want to be walking down the mall escalators on Christmas Eve with one of them.

Sure, they act a little crazy under pressure. Have you ever seen one of them respond to a sales person saying the dreaded words, “We’re all out of those.” No one wants to be around when that bomb drops and Word War 3 is launched in the war zone of Toys R’ Us. It’s incidents like these that strike fear among the general public every year on Black Friday.

But still, there’s something to be said about people who know how to get it done. They have a plan and they execute. They may not win the Miss Congeniality Award this Holiday season, but one has to appreciate the art form they make out of the simple task of gift giving.

You have to admire excellence, even excellence of the peculiar kind.

Well, lately I’ve had my own strategy at the mall. It’s not very good, but it is fast. I call it “The In and Out”, not to be confused with the beloved fast food chain In N’ Out, though both found their humble beginnings in Southern California.

“The In and Out” goal is simple. Get in and out of the mall as soon as possible. Find the first available parking space, not necessarily the best, just the first. This will cut back on losing precious minutes behind a line of cars in the parking lot. Avoid eye contact at all times. Studies have shown eye contact leads to conversations with strangers, and there’s no time for that. Walk quickly with a purpose. Find the shortest possible route to the store of interest and to the item you are interested in purchasing. This takes practice. If you aren’t paying close attention, and have not developed a bit of agility, than you are bound to run into a turning stroller, an elderly woman, or even a kissing couple. These all make for awkward moments, but especially the last one. Trust me.

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but today’s mission of “The In and Out” was executed with top-notch precision. I landed a new personal record! Some would say I’m a natural!

Yes, as embarrassing as it is to admit, I was chuckling to myself over this very thing while exiting the mall’s overcrowded parking lot. My “aren’t I funny and quirky” moment dwindled as I realized that I am not only a natural at “The In and Out” technique, but I also am, unfortunately, in far more important things as well.

“The In and Out” exists for one purpose- to survive the mall. It wasn’t created to experience the mall or impact the mall or even enjoy the mall.

Survive. That’s it.

I’m old enough to know that everyone has different ways of dealing with things. That doesn’t mean every way is the best way or even the healthiest way. But there definitely are lots of ways.

Seasons change. Sometimes, slower than we’d like; sometimes, it comes like a whirlwind of change that no one could have forecasted.

Some seasons we like a lot better than others. And it’s okay to admit that. Not every day is a stroll in the park. Not every day is supposed to be.

Some days come with real challenges we are forced to confront. Some days we have more tough choices to make than others.

And some days we’d wish would never end. Some days will leave memories that will ignite a smile on our face for years to come. Some days feel like a preview of Heaven.

But not all days are like that. Some days seem like more of a fight for Heaven than an experience of Heaven. Those are the days we have to dig deep to strike the oil of the Kingdom of God.

But the goal isn’t to survive our days. Life isn’t an experience at the mall where we accumulate what we want as comfortably and easily as possible. We’re not trying to survive here. And we’re not trying to just get more stuff.

Life isn’t just about surviving. Life is meant to be lived. Really lived. Eternal-living- type- living. The type of living Jesus died to give us on the cross. The type He promised in John 10:10.

The great tragedy comes when someone is given a shot at this kind of life and yet doesn’t change how they live day in and day out. Even though the goal is no longer simply to survive, many choose to live as if it is.

For me, that looks like plowing through. It looks like tackling each day and each season with “The In and Out” as my guide. It may not be your tactic, but I am realizing that when things get a little hard or busy, it has a tendency to become mine.

I turn everything into a competition where the quicker things happen the better. I want to speed past the hard stuff, the stuff that requires me to examine my own soul and to experience the growing pains of spiritual maturity. I find myself avoiding a different type of eye contact. In the scenario of life, I find ways to coast my friendships and relationships instead of deepen and strengthen them. My childhood falsely whispers to my soul that being lonely is safer than being part of anything resembling family, even if it’s healthy; even if it’s the family of God. And at all costs, I maneuver my actions to reach whatever goal I have set, even if it is at the expense of those around me.

And that’s how I survive. It keeps the collateral damage of my heart at a minimum. And my impact for the Kingdom of God even more minimal. So my heart is “safer”, but at what expense? And I suppose it depends on how you define “safer”. Independent and self-reliant isn’t always safer in the end.

However I look at my way of doing things, I must look at it through the lens of Jesus’ promise. And then it just doesn’t add up. It’s simply no way to live. Not when God created me for so much more. And not just, me, but you, too.

So what’s your way of living? What’s your grand strategy? I may not understand or even know of it, but if it’s goal is survival than it’s just not good enough for you. It’s a plan for a second-rate life, at best.

I’ve decided “The In and Out” is going into early retirement. It served its purpose. As a frightened little girl and as a young, broken woman, it in many ways shielded me, protected me. But I’m not afraid anymore. I’m not broken either. I’m being transformed. The old is out. Now I have a better guide. A perfect guide. Jesus.

May you, too, have the courage to venture into a new way of living, and may Jesus be your Perfect Guide.